San Francisco is a great place to have sex—especially if you’re a queer. There are so many different ways to explore and even exhibit your sexuality in this city—no matter what it is—that it can be overwhelming.

But one of the best things that has happened recently in my beloved hood is the sudden urge by lesbians to take their sex lives public. It used to be that lesbian sex was so shrouded in mystery that no one even knew what we did in bed. But dykes have recently decided to change that.

I’ve watched performance porn—sex events held in warehouses where lesbians mounted giant fucking machines designed to tirelessly piston them into endless orgasms. I’ve been to sex clubs where so many dykes were busy getting off you couldn’t find an empty face to sit down on. And I’ve watched hours and hours of locally produced porn.

The abundance of local dyke porn is a new phenomena. In the past few years every sex-positive babe you meet wants to be a pornstar and I should know since I get to make some of it.

Photo courtesy of Charles Gatewood

One of the most entertaining functions of being a pornographer is directing photo shoots. I get to not only watch women have sex, but I get to tell them how to do it. It’s a bit like being a perverted puppet master. And that doesn’t suck.

The photo shoots have taken place just about everywhere you can imagine. We’ve rented out gay male sex clubs to get the right feel for handballing scenes, we’ve captured female ejaculation shots in Victorian claw foot tubs and documented hard-core BDSM in hidden suburban dungeons.

The last shoot I directed was in my own apartment. My model, a gorgeous dyke with cropped hair and glitter make-up was 8 months pregnant and I wanted to make her as comfortable as possible. I’ll admit, it was my first foray into pregnant babe masturbation scenes, and it was definitely something I’d love to do again.

Her body was stunning. Absolutely flawless. Pre-pregnancy, she’d been a stripper. Actually, she’d stripped through the first part of her pregnancy as well. She had legs that went on forever and the cutest, roundest, sexiest and mind-blowing huge belly I’d ever seen naked, all topped off by a pair of large lovely breasts with glitter covered aureoles.

Photo courtesy of Charles Gatewood

Another boon to making porn in San Francisco is that nothing is shocking and no one cares. I was especially happy about that part at this particular shoot when the photographer decided that the light in my bay windows was perfect to showcase my pregnant lesbian’s pneumatic physique.

The model, not being able to fit into many of her clothes, wore only a pair of thigh-high black PVC boots with eight inch heels. She was a tall girl to begin with and the shoes made her Amazonian. She was glorious. My photographer posed her right smack in front of the open windows and instructed her to masturbate while I watched passersby gawk at first in confusion, then in admiration, and then simply continue on their way.

After the light changed we moved to my bed. My lovely pregnant pornstar showed off the piercings in her clitoral hood, inner labia and nipples from every angle I could possibly want and the three of us passed the rest of the afternoon happily talking away about masturbation techniques and sexual positions that work well for pregnant bodies. I even learned that vaginal fisting was actually a great way to stretch your perineum so that it won’t tear during childbirth. Too bad I don’t want children, since I’ve been prepping my perineum all these years.

My photographer was absolutely in heaven to have such a lovely exhibitionist at her disposal and I did my job of course, saying things like”wider, wider” as she spread her legs, and “turn your ass around to face me” when she was on all fours.

Yes indeed, it’s good work if you can get it.