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In my work with newcomers to the S/M scene, I offer guided shopping tours of San Francisco leather shops. When perusing stores of the sex-and-leather variety, Bay Area shoppers will find that in terms of ambience, there are really two options: boutique (clean, well-lit) or bondage barn (scarier, sleazier, and sexier). My favorite place to take nervous newbies with a penchant for restraint is Mr. S. Established 20 years ago by Brit Alan Selby, Mr. S has expanded from its humble, local beginnings to support three stores and an international mail order and online business. The company is renowned as a source of high-quality leather bondage gear and fetish clothing, with an emphasis on original design, custom work, and extraordinary customer service.  Of course, it can be difficult to remember the store's sterling reputation and commitment to quality when faced with a giant steel cage, leather body bags and suspension-equipped straight jackets, all on display within steps of the front door. The scary stuff, and lots of it, is what Mr. S does best: add this to the fact that the shop caters to a gay male clientele, and you've got enough taboo to keep middle America far, far away from the nipple clamps. Which is a terrible shame, and exactly why I encourage people to visit Mr. S —I'm a friendly escort to the nervous shopper.Such is the case when Kellie and I pull into the Mr. S parking lot in her minivan, and step out into the SOMA sunshine looking like poster children for the PTA in our slacks and sensible shoes. Our mission is to find a birthday present for her husband, a cross-dresser and bondage slut who loves the feel of leather. A relative novice to the SM arena, Kellie was thrilled with the leather bondage gear in my dungeon, and I knew a trip to the source was the next step. The heart of the Mr. S design team consists of scene players who bring their own passions to the workbench and "field test" each design, and all the gear is tailored on-site in an impressive workshop by a production team of over twenty workers. I tell her all this as I navigate her into the massive field of complicated leather restraints, shackles and harnesses that dominate the front of the store.  This is my favorite place on earth: I'm a true leather fetishist, and my hands itch to touch and admire the intricately designed sleep sack suspended from the cage walls. I wrap a hand around Kellie's arm and walk her to a pair of locking wrist-to-thigh cuffs, I guide her hand over the well padded leather, point out the seaming, take her fingers and trace the flawlessly finished edges, loop her index finger through the D-ring and help her give a firm tug.The moment she feels the softness of the cowhide I see her body relax, and I stand close to her, smiling with my eyes as I fasten the cuff over her Ann Taylor slacks, pointing out the rolling buckle mechanism as I cinch the straps to their tightest setting, while assuring her the workshop could custom size anything she fancied in the shop. As I strap her wrists into their cuffs, locking them to her thighs, I tell her good leather bondage is organic, it should feel like an extension of your partner's hands, it should feel like a caress as it holds you in a loving, helpless embrace. I tell her good leather bondage should be functionally inescapable, it should offer the psychological assurance of complete captivity, and I show her how the buckles accommodate simple padlocks. She pulls her slim wrist against its restraint, swoons a little at the creaking sound of new leather, and says that she can't imagine why anyone would want to fight their way out of such an incredible feeling piece of equipment. Exactly, I say. Kellie closes her eyes and inhales, filling her lungs with scent of the shop. And just like that, all the initial scariness of miles of black leather and heavy chains melt into a warm, comforting scent, a firm embrace, and the appreciation of fine craftsmanship.  One leather sling and a pair of locking wrist-to-thigh cuffs later, our trip concludes with a visit to the newly opened Madame S, located directly across the street. Established in September 2001, this newest addition to the Mr. S family has taken its place as San Francisco's premiere women's fetish clothier. The in-house line of latex and leather fetish fashions for women feature fresh and creative designs and immaculate construction, and Madame S also offers restraints and toys in rich reds, blues and greens: a nice departure from the basic black so predominant in fetish and bondage gear. By this point, Kellie is a full-fledged leather enthusiast, and she pops around noting the texture, styling and assembly of collars and corsets like and old pro.If your friendly neighborhood dominatrix is unavailable to escort you to Mr. S, don't despair. You'll be hard pressed to find a friendlier, less judgmental group of folks than those who staff the front counter. They will kindly walk you through every pair of nipple clamps and let you know exactly which cock ring is right for you with a smile, regardless of your gender, sexual orientation, or level of experience. There's special incentive to shop this holiday season, as the lovely folks at Mr. and Madame S are stepping out of the workshop and into the DNA Lounge on Dec. 1 to bring Bay Area pervs the Players & Players Ball, a celebration of all those hard working erotic laborers who keep us on the map as the modern day Babylon. So make your way to either Mr. or Madame S on 7th at Folsom, pick out a dress sure to impress, fill up your toy bag and join San Francisco's finest sexperts for a debauched evening of performance and play. More info on Mr. S is available at www.mr-s-leather-fetters.com/.
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