In Bahrain, a male doctor may legally examine a woman's genitals, but is forbidden from looking directly at them during the examination. He may only see their reflection in a mirror. Is anyone else getting weird flashbacks to Clash of the Titans or is it just me?
The largest penis in the animal kingdom belongs to the mighty blue whale. He is no less than 11 feet of fully functional hot whale action.
The distance sperm travels to fertilize an egg is three to four inches. The human equivalent is 26 miles (a marathon distance). Meanwhile, most of the human race can't make it from the couch to the fridge without huffing and puffing.
Men say the average erect penis is ten inches. Women say it's four inches. But what about girth, people? What about girth?
Among the Mangaians of Polynesia, 18-year-old couples make love an average of three times a night, every night, until their 30s, when the weekly average drops to a mere 14. (And then when they turn 40, their penises fall off. This is why it's all about quality, not quantity.)
29 percent of us are virgins when we marry.
 Actual amount of semen per ejaculation: one to two teaspoons.
Average number of times a man will ejaculate in his lifetime: 7200.
Average number of times he will ejaculate from masturbation: 2000.
Average total amount of lifetime ejaculate: 14 gallons.
Average speed of ejaculation: 28 miles per hour.
Odors that increase blood flow to the penis: lavender, licorice, chocolate, doughnuts, pumpkin pie. This may just be the real reason that women love chocolate.
A law in Alexandria, Minnesota makes it illegal for a husband to make love to his wife if his breath smells like garlic, onions, or sardines. It is also the only city where every legal official is a woman.
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Top Ten Signs You're Already Having a Bad Year
10. That "coke" you sniffed at the New Year's party was anthrax.
9. You've already been served a summons relating to that same party.
8. You've already spent 70 hours in a dark room by yourself watching Law & Order reruns on your Tivo.
7. One word… Raelians.
6. The IRS has already sent Agent Smith from The Matrix to warn you about tax time.
5. You're so bored you've already started buying next year's holiday gifts.
4. Your Christmas tree has already become more flammable than charcoal fluid.
3. Your subscription to Maxim just expired… right before the Christina Aguilera issue.
2. The gun you just put in your mouth was really just a cigarette lighter and it burned your uvula.
1. You've just read your first Top Ten list… and it's not even awards season! |
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