In the contest for "Most Ridiculous Prudes", Americans win for their attempt to clothe the naked sex organs on animals. In consequence, efforts were quickly made to design bikinis for stallions, petticoats for cows, knickers for bulldogs, and boxer shorts for small animals.
The most common sex superstitions of the UK are:
- A man with a small penis is always sexually inadequate.
- Masturbation will cause hair to grow on palms of hands, make men impotent women frigid or sterile, cause madness, etc.
- Women who never reach a climax are always frustrated.
- Women with small breasts are poor risks in bed.
- Women with large breasts are always sexy.
Prostitutes were often ordered by the municipal authorities to wear dress by which they could be distinguished. The fifteenth-century authorities of Venice decreed that the town prostitutes must sit with completely bare breasts at the windows. The idea, so the story goes, was that it was required so that the young men would be diverted from the "unnatural aberration" of homosexuality.
The oyster (Ostea edulis) has a habit of changing sex, but with a frequency dependent upon temperature. In one study at 20-22°C., an individual became female once a year, where as at 14-16°C., once every three to four years.
The Greeks were under the impression that they had birth control down. Soranus (A.D. 98-138), a Greek physician, advised women to "... in the moment during coitus when the man ejaculates his sperm, to hold her breath, draw her body back a little so that the semen cannot penetrate into the os uteri, then immediately get up and sit down with bent knees, and in this position, provoke sneezes."
 The most famous contraceptive hoax was perpetrated by a Canadian doctor, a certain J. S. Greenstein. He published a paper on a wholly fictitious contraceptive which he called "Armpitin," for which he sketched the chemical formula, including several molecular groups represented by the initials NO. "Armpitin," he explained, was found to affect males by way of the olfactory nerve, and rendered them sterile for a number of days equivalent to the number of NO Groups in the formula. The paper was seriously reviewed in an annual review of pharmacology, and Dr. Greenstein received requests from pharmaceutical companies to sell them the patent. Instead, he opted to sell them the Brooklyn Bridge.
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Top Ten Reasons to Make Love, Not War
10. Only occasionally do your testicles get blown off.
9. Protection doesn’t mean a gas mask… unless you want it to.
8. That female sergeant isn’t exactly Demi Moore.
7. Hearing said sarge bark out orders not as erotic as you’d hoped.
6. Requires slightly less strategic command.
5. We wouldn’t have to change “French kissing” to “freedom kissing” or some stupid fucking crap.
4. One word:hot protester chicks (wait, that’s three words).
3. Latex much more fashionable than Kevlar.
2. The Iraqi desert may look like Burning Man, but trust me, it’s not.
1. It would give a whole different slant to the global chant of “Bush sucks!”
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