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 "How do I get to fuck hot babes on camera?" the husky voice asked. When I worked on the San Francisco Sex Information (SFSI) phone line in 1997, I fielded countless calls from porn star wannabes. All of them were men.  I wasn't overly encouraging. To break into mainstream porn as a man, you need enormous natural resources, as well as the wherewithal to stay hard and squirt while cameras zoom in on your dick like birds of prey.X-rated acting rarely feels like sex. Even if you're humping the hottest thing in town, you both have to follow the director's orders. This means you rarely get a chance to find out whether you and your partner-in-porn have chemistry, so don't expect sexual fulfillment on set. And don't be surprised if your paid hanky-panky adds stress to your sex life off stage. While I worked at SFSI, I never got a call from a woman who wanted to be in porn. Perhaps fewer women fantasize about porn stardom, or the ones who do don't call sex information lines. I never expected to be in a porn video, until a friend suggested I audition for an alternative porn video made by people I knew. I already knew I wasn't going to run for office, so I figured what did I have to lose? I appeared in my first porn video at age 30. Some say you can't become a porn star after 30. You probably won't be the next Nina Hartley, but you can still be in porn. The porn industry fetishizes youth, but some of its other fetishes may surprise you. Three of my friends starred in Real Old People: Real Bondage, and none of them were "real old." One of them, I swear, was in her 30s. But they laughed at the "old" moniker and earned decent pay. And, hell, someone out there has a better sex life because he can watch people over 30 tie each other up.  I made my porn debut in Bend Over Boyfriend 2: More Rockin' Less Talkin' (1999, also known as BOB 2) by SIR productions, San Francisco's very own all-girl production crew. Unlike most porn, BOB 2 shows footage of real-life couples having sex. You can see them sizzle on screen.In the original Bend Over Boyfriend (1998), San Francisco's premiere sexologists Dr. Carol Queen and her partner Dr. Robert Morgan provided much-needed instruction in anal play and communication for male-female couples. Thanks to this video, more bi and het men know how to take it up the ass, and emergency rooms have perhaps pulled fewer vibrators and cell phones out of their patients' wazoos. The sequel Bend Over Boyfriend 2 featured more hot anal scenes with less instruction. Shar Rednour directed me in a three-way with Queen and Troy Trixx, a beautiful longhaired Latino man, who had also starred in the first Bend Over Boyfriend. The three-way involved a pretend pedagogical lesson in which Dr. Queen tutored ingénue Lisa Lixx (played by yours truly) in the art of strap-on fucking. Troy bent over—exposing his exquisitely trained asshole. I strapped on my dildo and harness, lurched my pelvis forward and missed, poking him in the butt-cheek. Queen demonstrated proper technique with Vixen's vibrating dildo: the Peggy Sue. Troy was in butthole nirvana. By the end of the lesson, I was thrusting with accuracy and acumen. At the time of Bend Over Boyfriend 2 I was a true ingénue when it came to porn. I knew how to use a strap-on, but I would look at the camera in the middle of the sex scene, as if to say, "Hi Mom!"  The week before the shoot, I fell down a flight of stairs and got a bruise on my butt the size of a grapefruit. I went to a theater makeup boutique, but bought the wrong color base to hide my bruises. The director was horrified, and the crew had to avoid filming my butt, which was one of my main assets in porn. My butt had to wait until later to make its debut.BOB2 is the most artistically well-crafted video I've been in, but I prefer how I look in other videos. My favorite is the masturbation scene in the opening of Slide Bi Me, a Sex Positive Productions video, nominated for an AVN award in 2002. Sex Positive Productions had the most ethnically diverse cast and crew I've worked with, although the majority of us lived in San Francisco. By this time I had been in four videos, so I had some experience. In Slide Bi MeI played an uptight woman executive, who turns into a raving nympho, after she eats aphrodisiac potato salad at the company picnic. The video opens with a scene of me masturbating with a vibrator in the backseat of a van. One of the reasons I like this scene is because I actually had a great orgasm. Like many folks, I can't always reach orgasm when I'm holding uncomfortable sexual positions in front of a camera crew. Fortunately, since I'm a woman, I don't have to ejaculate on camera, so this doesn't keep me out of porn. I just don't audition for female ejaculation roles.  I got into most of the videos by knowing someone—in many cases the director. I appeared in three of Geoffrey Karen Dior's bisexual videos after "meeting" Geoffrey in a group sex scene. Later I discovered this was how he typically held auditions.Geoff has directed more than 100 videos and starred in 100 more. As a director, he invents the plot of the video on the set. I starred in Bi for Pay and Bis Wide Open. My funniest video was Fuck Holes 75: Sissy Boys, in which I played a predatory girl-next-door, who lures boys from the neighborhood into my parlor, forces them to wear lingerie, and fucks them up the ass with dildos as wide as my thigh. This was consensual. My male co-stars feigned horror, as I "forced" them into compromising positions. But actually they liked wearing lingerie and selected the giant dildos themselves. This video was a joy. I appeared most recently in Playboy Sexcetera #37. The show aired last January 2003 on Playboy TV. Like most of the videos mentioned above, the Playboy footage was "bisexual porn," but the Playboy segment appealed to a more mainstream market: it showed bisexual women, while the other "bi" videos showed bi men as well. Women having sex with women appeals to the mainstream hetero market; men having sex with men does not. For me, this was the first porn appearance in which I wasn't previously acquainted with the director or producer (through group sex or some other means). Cara Bruce and I were promoting Best Bisexual Women's Erotica, which Cara edited. The anthology contains one of my stories, "Surrender Dorothy."
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