In 2000 BC the Egyptians used elephant dung as contraceptives. Yikes, beware of beetles!
Genophobia is the fear of sex. “Gee, no phobia” is the absence of the fear of sex.
Whistling is the number one way to attract the opposite sex. Hmm, curiously enough, this also is the number one way to attract a dog or a horse. Cats don’t respond so well.
In related trivia, U.S. Patent #5,163,447 was granted to a whistling condom. (Which I guess would also attract females.) When a small sensor in the condom senses movement, it causes a tiny apparatus to whistle "Dixie." Wow, does a tiny confederate flag pop out? (By the way, the word “condom” and the phrase “tiny apparatus” should never appear in the same sentence.) I think it should whistle “Daisy,” like in 2001; then, when the penis starts to go limp it can be like HAL’s slowed-down voice singing, “Daisy, Daisy, give… me… your… answerrrr… trrruuue… ”
Couples that marry in January, February or March have the highest divorce rate. Couples that don’t marry at all have the lowest.
According to the World Health Organization, 100 million acts of sexual intercourse occur each day. And if anybody’s lying to the WHO, be warned; they won’t get fooled again. (God, that’s so bad I almost pulled it out. Almost.)
The average length of a flaccid penis is four inches. Unless it’s Donald Rumsfeld.
The p.h. of the vagina is 4.0 to 5.0, which is fairly acidic. Maybe that’s what the pool boy was doing there… |
Top Ten Silly Names for Vagina:
10. Cooter.
9. Bearded clam.
8. Cooch.
7. Fuzzy lap flounder.
6. Muff.
5. Whisker biscuit.
4. Split-faced hair shark.
3. Poontang.
2. Quim.
1. Beaver.
 |
fiction
