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Extreme troubles for controversial porn couple Back in the '70s, there was a really bad and pretty offensive film called I Spit on your Grave, a perfect example of repugnant exploitation in which a young female writer rents a cabin in the woods and is raped repeatedly by some Deliverance-style yokels. Afterwards, she reaps revenge on the rapists, but not before you've sat through a film so awful you feel like taking a shower when it's done.  For years it stood as a low point in "cinema," a kind of Mariana Trench of filmed human indignity.Well, last year's Extreme Associates adult film Forced Entry certainly changed all that. Think I Spit on your Grave with painful penetration, real violence, and simulated murder. During the filming of an installment of PBS' Frontline, wherein the production of Forced Entry was documented, the camera crew was so disturbed they compelled to pack up and leave. Now Extreme owner Rob Black and wife Lizzie Borden (a former adult performer who directed Forced Entry) are discovering that censorship is alive and well in John Ashcroft's US after being indicted by a Pennsylvania grand jury on federal charges of obscenity. Authorities say that the charges of part of a new crackdown on obscenity, which, while very difficult to establish, is not protected by the First Amendment. Good show, feds, on that whole post-terrorism agenda. It sure was a lot easier to find Black and Borden than bin Laden, yeah? The Extreme team remains defiant, even offering a package deal on the five vids feds are so pissed off about—Forced Entry, Cocktails 2, Extreme Teen #24, Ass Clowns #3, and the "instructional" film 1001 Ways to Eat My Jizz—as "The Federal Five." (For aficionados, Forced Entry, Cocktails 2, and Ass Clowns #3 are all director's cuts, shown the way they were meant to be seen.
What I can and will comment on is the crime of stupidity exhibited by Extreme in sending their product through the U.S. Postal Service. Most distributors of adult products use UPS or Fed Ex, simply because using the USPS opens a company up to just this kind of nonsense. I'm just keeping my fingers crossed that a precedent on the idea of obscenity won't be made in this case. The courts have defined it as anything that goes beyond a "community standard." And while porn production is the community standard in L.A.'s San Fernando Valley, where Forced Entry was produced, it might not play so well in Pittsburgh, where Black and Borden are set to be arraigned later this month. Syphilis rates rise in Britain Britain's Health Protection Agency warned last week that syphilis rates had soared to the highest level since the onset of AIDS.  The agency announced in its Communicable Diseases Review newsletter that infectious syphilis diagnoses climbed by 67 percent in men and 33 percent in women between 2001 and 2002.In addition to previously reported increases within the gay population, the report found that heterosexual rates are on the rise. Cases in just South London had tripled within the span of a year. Seventeen of the people involved were known to be linked to the sex industry, 20 had had unprotected oral sex and 48 unprotected vaginal sex. London proper was clearly hit the hardest, with 980 people being diagnosed between April 2001 and May this year. Succumbing to a bit of finger-wagging, the agency reported that newly established sex-related venues such as saunas, cruising grounds and Internet chat rooms (?) had increased were significantly to blame for the epidemic. San Francisco and the US in general, as well as other locations around the globe, have already seen similar statistics surface, and the agency found Britain's current problem has a lot in common with them. "The characteristics of the outbreaks are very similar to those seen in Western Europe and the United States, infection being associated with high incidence areas, high rates of partner change within risk groups and concurrent HIV infection." Semen displacement and deposit, all in one! You already know that the human penis is an amazing tool (no pun intended) of pleasure and reproduction. But if you have one, you may not know of all of its amazing features. For instance—last week Reuters reported that Gordon Gallup and researchers at the State University of New York in Albany have discovered that the ridge of the penis acts as a semen displacement device in cases where there's more than one rooster in the henhouse, if you know what I'm sayin'.  In experiments using latex replicas, an artificial vagina and a cornstarch mixture, "They found that the coronal ridge... could scoop out more than 90 percent of the cornstarch mixture (from the artificial vagina) with just one thrust, while a phallus with no coronal ridge only managed to remove 35 percent," according to New Scientist magazine.Gallup said the depth of penetration was also important in expelling more semen. Their findings were supported with surveys of students who were questioned about their sexual experiences. "Sexual intercourse often involved deeper more vigorous penile thrusting following periods of separation or in response to allegations of female infidelity," they said. Yes, that's it ladies. If your man isn't fucking you hard and deep like you like it, just go out and cheat on him… that'll fix it. Ew, penis stew If there's anything that tireless hospital clichés have taught us, it's that the food sucks.  Well, perhaps nobody on this planet knows more about this than 60-year-old Sophie Matlala, who works in South Africa's Medforum Hospital.Local paper The Star reported last week that Matlala discovered a penis in the goulash being served for lunch at the hospital, but not until biting into the mystery meat, only to find it too tough to eat. She showed the chunk to colleagues, who to their horror concluded it was a penis, though it was impossible to tell whether it was human or animal since it had been cooked. Meanwhile, Matlala spent the rest of the day vomiting profusely, and has since pledged to be a vegetarian. She's suing the hospital, claiming it had a duty to inspect what it feeds its employees. For its part, Medforum is assuring its patients that the slop they give their workers isn't from the same supplier they get their guests' food from, so as not to be alarmed. They just better pray that Beanie Weenies aren't on the menu.
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