Sure, your sex is sizzling, but how are your communication skills? Here's a way to help enhance your love life by training you to make more than just a carnal connection. This unique two-sided board game engages couples in a romantic match of giving and receiving, artfully melding thought and feeling with sensual pleasure. In addition to passing the time, playing "Speak Love, Make Love" will help you become a better communicator.
2. Tricky Cozy
$14, www.goodvibes.com
If your favorite sex toy could use a bit of discretion, check out this red fleece devil cozy. It's the perfect way to disguise your vibrator, dildo or other sex toy. Just tighten the drawstring and hang it from your bedpost or carry it on your wrist with some extra cash for the perfect handbag. Holds any item up to 7 1/2" long, 3 1/2" in diameter.
3. Romantic Get-a-way
$20.97, www.sextoys411.com
Okay, so these packages have almost become a cliché. But if you're looking to heat things up...Wait, that line has become a cliché too! The bottom line is, everyone can use a little nudge now and then, and ready-made romance packages like these really are a wonderful way to say "Let's have sex" in a more subtle manner. Here you'll get an assortment of lotions, oils and sexessories guaranteed to help you "Get Busy."
4. Selling Credits Gift Certificate
www.FoxyBids.com
What to give the person who has everything? How about an efficient way to help them unload some of their everythings? Sure, there's always eBay, but FoxyBids is for those items that eBay won't let you sell. This is the marketplace for the corset you've outgrown, the six-inch spike heels that hurt too much or back issues of out-of-print porn mags. It could also be the perfect place to swap amateur sex videos! Proprietrix Tahlulu has designed the Seller's Credit Gift Certificates especially for Eros-Zine.com! Now everyone clean out those closets!
5. Python Nipple Ring
$300, www.keirankaci.com
Sexy Jewelry. Keiran Kaci has designed stunning and sexually provocative pieces of fine jewelry. Wear Kaci's signature nude woman bangle bracelet or pair of earrings. Or sport her signature pendant, also a nude woman, but adorned with a sparkling blue topaz. There are serpent cock rings and stackable rings of nude men and women. Her mermaid collection isn't quite as kinky but equally beautiful. Studded with diamonds, rubies, sapphires and pearls, these extravagant accoutrements are guaranteed to attract both attention and compliments. Prices range from $500 for a stars and stripes nipple ring and go as high as $3200 for a solid white gold and sapphire cock ring. If you're on a budget, pick up the white gold Python Nipple Ring with a sapphire eye for only $300.
6. Madame Khufu Harpy Mask
$160, www.madamekhufu.com
John Colby's delicious masks can be seen on all the sexiest dommes at the country's most exclusive fetish events and the artist has shown his masks in fashion shows at such illustrious destinations as the UK's Rubber Ball and Kink in the Caribbean. The cleverly crafted shiny black masks have been spotted for sale at The Black & Blue Ball, Boston's Fetish Flea and other kinky marketplaces. Prices range from $50 for a simple piece to over $200 for a custom piece. The horned masks are especially interesting and we liked the Harpy mask the best.
A long-lasting gift that will be breathtaking forever! We simply couldn't resist The Tattoo Collection, specifically the Sacred Heart and Slave designs. This collection made its debut at Philadelphia's Diabolique Ball in 2001, but the designs are timeless. Since the garments are only available by custom order and each corset takes four to six weeks to complete, it isn't the perfect choice for you last minute shoppers. But if your shapely recipient would be satisfied with a gift certificate, you can bestow the promise of a corset for 2004.
8. Bill Dobbins, Modern Amazons
$39.99, www.taschen.com
Photographer Bill Dobbins has captured modern-day musclewomen both at work and at play. This collection of fine art photos and essays offers the reader a peek into the fascinating world of extreme female body builders.
9. Mink of 9 Tails Flogger
$95, minkof9tails.tripod.com
If our friends at PETA will forgive us, there's nothing like the sensuous feel of fur. Especially when you're getting flogged! We discovered this company at last year's BondCon in Vegas and haven't stopped thinking about the furry floggers since! The "M9S" is 18 inches long from the top of the leather handle to the tip of the nine luxurious mink tails, and its "duster" style is an elegant starter piece for the fetish-curious.
10. Pan's House of Horns Gypsy Star Horns
$25, www.panshouseofhorns.com
This whimsical horn company is based in San Francisco and produces some delightfully devilish accessories. Our favorite is the Gypsy Star model because of the irresistible glitter! What makes Pan's horns imminently wearable is the invisible elastic fishing line they're strung on, making them appear to be actually growing right out of your own skull. No messy spirit gum or eyelash glue necessary!
11. Rubber Room Pornaments' Bondage Santa Wreath
$40, www.rubberroom.com
What kinkster's Christmas tree would be complete without one of these hilarious decorations? We first spotted this little cottage industry at one of The Baroness's Fetish Retinues and they've since vended at Boston's Fetish Flea and Manhattan's Gomorrah. Adorable horny snowmen, bound cherubs and fetishy masked heads are molded out of rubber. They also sell "Tormented Teddies," tiny bears sporting strap-ons and nipple clamps. They put a sick little kink into Christmas decor!
12. DeTails Love Hurts Flogger
Medium tail: $100
Double medium tail: $175
www.detailstoys.coml
What better way to tell your submissive how much you care than with one of DeTails beautiful elk floggers adorned with adorable suede hearts? Choose from 18 or 36 tails with hearts of black, red, white, purple, turquoise, hunter green, gray, burgundy, or gold. It's like a holiday Valentine for your derriere!
13. DeTails Rose Flogger
$175-$275, www.detailstoys.com
Equally irresistible is the DeTails Rose Flogger, their signature piece. Offering the bonus of the "roses and the thorns," this flogger comes with either hand braided leather or barbed rubber tails, each ending in romantic leather rose. You can order a half-dozen roses for $175 or the full dozen roses for $275. DeTails will add on silver "thorns" at $1.00 each and a maximum of three thorns per tail. Your recipient will never settle for real roses again!
14. Whipsmart: A Good Vibrations Guide to Beginning SM for Couples
$19.95, www.goodvibes.com
Mistress Morgana has been called the Martha Stewart of S&M, and this instructional video certainly spotlights her plainspoken, homespun style. In a safe and soothing way, she explains the ABCs of BDSM. The video also features a few vignettes of sensual action between couples, both homo and het, making it a perfect gift not only for learning but foreplay as well!
15. Steel Couture Chainmail Star Bikini
$280, www.steelcouture.com
Of course, you can order each piece separately, but why wouldn't you want both? Imagine two gold chainmail stars resting upon your breasts and a scallop-edged bikini bottom with a g-string back, fashioned out of tiny metal rings. Both pieces will be custom made to your specific measurements, making you THE super-heroine of your next trip to the beach! If you must, buy the bikini top alone for $120 or the bottoms for $160.
Barbara Klar's gorgeous jewelry used to be available at her store on Thompson Street in Manhattan, but now her wares are available at only a few retail locations. But fear not! There's always the vast expanse of cyberspace! All her work is romantic yet rugged, the perfect juxtaposition of emotions for the urban savage with a soft spot. Our favorite pieces are her heart charms, from the "Winged" heart ($30 or $53) to those stamped with conversation heart messages ("Candy" hearts, $45 or $55), the "Locked" heart and its keyhole ($30, $48 or $63) to the "heart in bondage" with its trapped pink or red zirconia ($75), each proffering a personal message between gift giver and recipient. Or you can tell your lover just how long your passion will last with the "Infinity Heart" ($68).
17. Photography for Perverts
$27.95, www.greenerypress.com
Possibly one of the BDSM community's longest-standing perverts, Charles Gatewood has been chronicling offbeat antics for over 30 years. His latest collection of kinky pix is hot off the Greenery Presses! With 180 black and white photos and 16 pages of color images, you'll receive a broad array of fetishes, freakishness and other explicit proclivities.
18. Dreaming in Color
$58.85, www.greenerypress.com
If you're more prone to amassing collector's items, you might want to go through the more elaborate machinations required to purchase Greenery Press's special edition anthology of erotic writing. With never-before-published poems, essays and stories by more than 20 of Greenery Press's authors, including Midori, Jay Wiseman and Tammy-Jo Eckhart; a cloth bound hard cover inset with an exclusive, unpublished Gatewood photograph; and a limited edition of only 500 copies, your purchase will grow more valuable over the years. To buy one, you must send a check or money order for $58.85 to Greenery Press, 3403 Piedmont Ave. #301, Oakland, CA 94611, send $58.85 to the Greenery Press PayPal account at [email protected], or call 888/944-4434 with your VISA or MasterCard.
19. Buzz Me Panties
$30, www.babeland.com
Toys in Babeland offers all sorts of female-friendly sex toys, but the most amusing by far is the pair of Buzz Me Panties. Made of black spandex-like cotton with red trim and a tattoo-like Buzz Me logo, these knickers have a secret pocket specially designed to hold a little Zippy Vibe that will give the lucky woman hours of thrill-packed panty-wearing! Comes with the Zippy Vibe AND batteries!
20. Heartbreaker Vibe
$56, www.babeland.com
In our line of work, we've seen more than enough sex toys, so it takes a special product for us to sit up and take notice. Such was the case with Toys in Babeland's Heartbreaker Vibe, a matte silicone phallus that made us purr the second we picked it up. It feels good, it looks good, and it vibrates so very nicely. Ergonomically designed and possessing a somewhat humorous pop-art appeal, this baby will become your favorite pastime in NO time! The pliable silicone is ringed with ridges and the the flower power adjustable speed dial has variable speeds. This one is too pretty to hide in your bedside drawer. Display it proudly! It comes with its own stand and two AA batteries.
There are leather shorts and then there are THESE Leather Chastity Shorts! Wow! The detailed description says it all: Extra long legs to insure no wandering, a locking zipper fly, a generous lined cock flap, and six locking points INCLUDING six padlocks! If you really, really want to make sure your boysub doesn't get his cock sucked on the side, this is definitely the pair of shorts for you! Or should we say for your boysub? Leather Creations has only a few pairs available in limited sizes, or you can place an order and hope for the best. These are the filthiest fashion items we've ever seen!
22. Holiday Tree of Treats
$39.95, www.harryanddavid.com
Okay, so you're covered with the kinky stuff, but what about Aunt Harriet? Even perverts need to make family-friendly purchases. Here's a warm little present you can send anywhere in the country when you can't be there in person. This 20 to 26-inch Dwarf Alberta Spruce is spruced up with candy canes, mint chocolates and twinkling lights, then topped with a holiday plaid bow and potted in a little drummer boy cache pot. There are also Snowman and Angel Trees available so Aunt Milly and Aunt Grace can each receive their own special gift!
23. Chicken Dance Elmo
$15.99, www.amazon.com
The Tickle Me Elmo was THE gift to grab a few years ago, and this one may be "so last year." But there's something about Elmo...there's something about "The Chicken Dance." Hell, there's something about ANY toy that sings and wiggles. Plus, if your little niece or nephew already has one, this will keep you company...um, if you don't mind grinding against a Muppet dancing to a drinking tune!
Okay, you're here, aren't you? Online? You're surfing for fun stuff, how about entering the 21st Century and making some fun of your own? If you don't already own one, buy YOURSELF a digital camera. We promise it will bring you hours of inexplicable joy! Our favorite for just skipping around town and snapping shots of whatever catches our fancy is the Canon PowerShot Digital Elph. The S400 is a 4.0 megapixel with a 3x Canon Zoom lens and all sorts of bells and whistles to keep you tech-heads entertained. But the ease with which you will find yourself shooting, downloading and sharing is what makes this the MUST HAVE item! It's all that stands between you and your very own fetish web site! Now, get started! And Happy 2004!
fiction
3. Romantic Get-a-way
6. Madame Khufu Harpy Mask
8. Bill Dobbins, Modern Amazons
12. DeTails Love Hurts Flogger
15. Steel Couture Chainmail Star Bikini
20. Heartbreaker Vibe