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Lou, a bisexual male in his 40s, made the decision to found a formalized bisexual group after one particularly exciting evening in the summer of 2002. Lou was partying with a female artist friend and lover who revealed that while she had had several long-term relationships with men, she also had several female lovers. "I told her that I, too, am bisexual and she was surprised," Lou explains. "My friend then told me she was really turned on by a mutual friend of ours," Lou says, so he arranged a get-together. "I called up our mutual friend and invited her to party with us. As the night went on, we got more horny and uninhibited, and we eventually experienced every imaginable threesome combination. We watched the sun rise, our naked bodies pretzeled together, and joked about how we'd known each other for several years, but had not known that the others were bisexual." This led Lou to start the Bisexual New York City Yahoo group in October 2002. He soon formed two additional groups, Bisexual Adult and Bisexual Threesomes, which really took off. Within months he had added groups for every state in the U.S. and for countries all over the world, plus special interest bisexual groups, including Bisexual Orgy, Bisexual Married, Bisexual Friends, Bisexual Singles, Bisexual Women for Couples, Bisexual Men for Couples, Bisexual Fetish and Bisexual Transgender. When it comes to sexuality, there seem to be endless permutations, both geographical and preferential. Once there were almost 100 Yahoo groups, they became difficult to manage, so Lou set up www.BiNation.org to make it easier for people to join the groups. The Bi Nation Yahoo bisexual groups now have over 125,000 subscribers.  "New York is definitely becoming more bi," Lou tells me. "When I frequented Plato's Retreat in the 1980's, it was very heterosexual. The bath houses were all gay." Another experience back in the 80's proved that the two worlds could coexist. "When I was in San Francisco in the 1980's, they had a co-ed bath house which was great for a bisexual like myself, as I was able to have sex with both women and men under one roof."But Manhattan establishments don't go quite as far as Lou would like. Two years ago, he tells me, "I went to La Trapeze with two female lovers. We met an Italian couple and all five of us went to a room together." After great sex with the woman, Lou chose to sit back and watch the girls play with each other. But he and the other gentleman didn't make any contact. "I was thinking of grabbing the Italian guy's cock, but held back. I knew that at all these clubs it was very taboo for a man to even touch another man. I was disgusted at how these clubs have a double standard on bi-male play, that they were not very liberated and were homophobic." Contact between females is always popular, though: "These days, when I go to the swing clubs in New York, especially Checkmates, there is a lot of bi-female play." Lou decided "it was time for the bisexuals to have their OWN party, so I started the first bisexual party in New York City." Lou's Bi Nation throws monthly parties in luxury hotel suites. "As the parties became more popular, I set up another web page www.BiSwinger.com, so that people could get more information on the events. Bi Nation / BiSwinger.com is now a NASCA member and listed in the national directory of swing clubs. What is going on in Manhattan surpasses what has been called "swinging." Partner-swapping and watching one's wife get jiggy with another babe goes back to 70's key parties and sex orgies, but it's been a while since the more rare public interactions between men who don't identify strictly as gay has been generally acceptable. At an event just this past weekend, we witnessed two men enjoying the company of one woman - and each other! It was an electrifying lip-lock that is emblematic of this shift toward any and all sexual activity being acceptable.
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