The parties that happen in association with the big Vegas porno convention are usually crap. They have fancy fliers, they promise featured porn stars who never show up and you usually wind up in a long line with drooling fans. Not my idea of a good time. So after the AVN Awards, I was at a loss.
We wandered to the Circle Bar in the center of The Venetian's casino, where most people congregate, but we'd already spent the previous night there - till 4:30 am. I wasn't sure I could stomach another six hours of just milling around with mid-level stars. There was a semi-private party in an almost un-findable club within The Venetian, but by the time we found it, it already had the markings of a loud house-y night. Ugh.
When we were on our way back to our hotel room to stash our cache of sex toy party favors, Paul Nathan passed us by. We were quick to inquire: "Where's the fun?" Paul suggested the official after-party, but when my lip curled contemptuously he scribbled a suite address on my bag of sex toys. "This should be fun, not now, but later on!" he offered, and trailed away with his lovely young date.
After further bumbling, my escort asked, "Does your friend Paul know good parties?" I said yes, of course, so off we went in search of the secret suite. We ran into Stevie Secrets, who was also on her way. After some necessary smooth-talking with the security guard, we were ascending to the suites.
As Paul had said, it was still early and the soiree was somewhat sparse. But it was also Paul's party, so I knew it would eventually be good. His co-hosts were Dirty Dan, who was already gettin' dirty, and a couple of BDSM webmeisters from Brooklyn. There was foot worshipping in one corner, a stunning tranny in a cheerleader uniform cavorting on the bar, gorgeous gothy girls serving up cocktails and salacious weirdness happening on the king sized bed. It looked promising!
When Blue Blood's Amelia G. called my cell in search of the same sort of fun, I gave her the coordinates, then offered ditto to my crazy friend Bonobo Jim. Soon we had our own crew to complement the accruing crowd, and when porn stud and sex celeb Ron Jeremy arrived, we knew we were in just the right spot!
Dennis Hof of Bunny Ranch fame and Motorhead's Lemmy joined the festivities moments later and they were like the frosting on the freakfest. There was an abundantly fleshy female being fisted in the bedroom, where someone else was being simultaneously spanked and skewered with a butt plug. I realized it was Dirty Dan, now definitely getting down and dirty!
Tara Emory, the aforementioned delicious cheerleader tranny, was offered a display of her pissing skills in the bathroom, and we all dutifully followed along. On the first trip, she managed to spout an impressive fountain of urine from her equally impressive hard-on into a wine goblet, but on the subsequent foray, most of her copious bladder's contents were spouted right into her wide-open mouth. Huzzah! We all enthusiastically applauded!
The couple groping each other against the vanity mere inches from where we stood seemed oblivious to our presence - and the numerous mirrors, which offered us multiple views of their heaving body parts. Another couple opted for closing the sliding door that separated the toilet from the rest of the huge bathroom, and we all groaned "Poor sports!" Why have sex in private when there were so many appreciative audience members!
A skinny chick in clingy slacks dropped her drawers and was serviced by assorted gentlemen while she sucked on a few whip-its. And that fleshy babe was STILL being fisted!
Things generally deteriorated from there. The rooms got smokier, the vodka-infused watermelon began to resemble rotting intestines and people were shedding articles of clothing. This was all in the midst of other revelers chatting, sipping and barely noticing the surrounding carnalities. I won't go into any more delectable details, but suffice it to say, this was the best party of the week!
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